Attain Emotional Balance & How to Achieve Self-Fulfillment

These days, self-care is a big button issue for everyone. Everyone is seeking emotional health and fulfillment, but don't know how to achieve it. Ask yourself, how often do you take care of others over yourself? To be strong for others, you have to take care of yourself first.

If you don’t take responsibility for yourself, then no one else will; then nothing in yourself or life will change. If you don't take of yourself first, then you can't take care of another person. Think of being on an airplane and the oxygen masks drop down. What is the procedure? You put your mask on first before someone else. If if you do it for the other person, you run out of oxygen quickly and you both perish.

So the first thing you do to move into emotional health and embrace self-fulfillment is to take care of yourself. Self-care means paying attention to your thoughts, emotions, and physical sensations now. You do that by cleaning up unresolved situations long ignored. It is giving care and attention to yourself.

Personal health, confidence, and fulfillment come from processing what was not before, rather than just gaining personal insight.

3 Steps to Emotional Balance & Achieving Self-fulfillment 

Below are specific ways to seek emotional health and fulfillment. Follow the methods below to help you with processing present issues, as well as past material that you might not have ever dealt with.

1. Intuitive Approach. 

First, to enter into processing from an intuitiveness mindset approach, where you can't be in your thoughts or feelings. Both your thinking and feeling will betray you and suck you into reliving. 

Intuitive processing is the practice of digesting past pain from gut instinct or sensing actually guttural observing your thoughts, emotions, and physical sensations from a witness position instead of being involved as a participant. The difference between "I feel right now I am hurting" (Caught up in or re-experiencing) and "My heart is hurt due to..." (Sensing the process). "I feel like a victim," "I sense I was a victim."; “I feel not good enough,” “I was labeled as not good enough.”

Therapy is not processing. The therapeutic approach is the practice of immersing into the thoughts, emotions, and physical sensations to gain self-insight but can quickly result in surfacing triggers and realistic reexperiencing activating the fight or flight mechanism. Therapy is not processing.

Second, successful processing has to come from your second brain, which, if you don't, is your gut. Your gut is a place of "sensing" and is void of thinking and feeling. That is why processing can be so helpful.

Third, in order to process what you need to, you have to "step back" from yourself (divorcing yourself from the drama of the memory, false emotions, and distorted thinking) and witness the content of what happened, what you experienced, and all the drama connected. 

If you can accomplish 1 through 3, you are ready for an intuitive approach.

Now, in my opinion, therapy is not processing. The therapeutic approach is the practice of immersing into the thoughts, emotions, and physical sensations of the client to gain self-insight. Therapy can quickly result in surfacing triggers and realistic re-experiencing which can activate the fight or flight mechanism. Therapy is not processing.

2. Recognize what you have not processed yet.

Be honest and authentic with yourself. Recognizing is not a platform for judgment or criticism. 

3. Don't get caught up in the residual drama of the issue you need to process.

 Now is now. Now is not yesterday, nor is it the future.

4. Don't hide or act out 

The first instinct is to hide, run from, or fight the thoughts, emotions, and physical sensations or onslaught of triggers. If you are in a witness stance, the fight or flight mechanism will not activate. 

5. Do not stop

Keep chewing to allow the digestion (processing ) to reach the desired mission, going out of your body and mind. For people who are not able to digest (process life situations) the symbolic result is that the body either holds on to the poop (constipation - can't get rid of it or get it out, causing a high level of constriction or restriction) or diarrhea (can't control or hold poop). Neither constipation nor diarrhea is healthy for digestion (emotional processing or self-fulfillment).

6. Take action

Change how you label yourself. Don't engage in self-criticism, self-judgment,  self-rejection, or self-victimization. Instead, support yourself by loving yourself, encouraging yourself, and having compassion for yourself. 

You should always be your number one priority.
                                    Coach Bill