Can You Sit with Your Own Thoughts?

Would you select electrocution at you own hands or sit alone with your own thoughts?

That was the fundamental human question behind a research study I recently read a research study that was done at the University of Virginia. The researchers wanted to find out if a participant if asked, would the participant rather sit quietly with his or her own thoughts or select to electrocute themselves?

That was the fundamental human question behind a research study I recently read that was done at the University of Virginia. The researchers wanted to find out if a participant if asked, would the participant rather sit quietly with his or her own thoughts or select to electrocute themselves.

The one thing abuse or trauma situations rob a person off is the ability to accept and be with is their own thoughts or in a room in solitude without distraction. As all survivors know especially survivors with DID, being alone with their own thoughts can be very chaotic, hurtful mean, painful uncomfortable and/or devastating. 

Study 

A recent study finds that “we'd rather electrocute ourselves than be alone with our own thoughts.”

Personal Experiences

OMG, I have been writing for years about changing your life through journaling, mediation (Me Time) or just deep breathing for 5 to 10 minutes with yourself, without being externally distracted or stimulated. I mean spending time, without a book, computer, phone, television, tablet or radio, with yourself. Nothing to stare at or defocus you for a time of 5 to 10 minutes and left alone with you.

I cannot tell you how many of my clients cannot or had difficulty completing this simple task. Even though spending just 5 or 10 minutes a day with themselves has been proven to improve their life and health (mentally, emotionally, physically, and spiritually) as well as release stresses they were holding onto, they can’t seem to complete even a few minutes. The excuses I hear from my clients are “Oh I forgot,” “I am too busy, but I meant to,” “I tried, but just I couldn't focus,” I couldn't find any time,” or “I get too anxious.”

With those clients that have a history of being bullied, harassed, abused or traumatized when asked if they did their 5 minutes I am told “I didn't like the thoughts that went through my head”, “I could not stop my thoughts long enough to focus just on my breathing as you asked me to do. It felt wrong”, “While I was doing it a negative thought jump into my head and I could not get rid of it once I stopped meditating” and “Truthfully I can’t stand to be with me. I do not think I deserve it”.

The overall underlying messages I get from my clients are basically that being with their own thoughts or being in their own skin is uncomfortable. Above all, alone or quiet time should be avoided at all cost. When alone most of them have either a TV running somewhere in the house or music playing to fill their head with distraction.

The fundamental human question is, have we lost the ability to be alone with our own thoughts?

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           Coach Bill