William Tollefson Values Blog provides information on many topics and issues pertaining to survivors of childhood and/or adulthood abuse, trauma, or combat situations.
Written by Dr. Bill Tollefson, Ph.D. Certified Master Life, Post Trauma and Holistic Addiction Recovery Coach.
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Friday, February 20, 2015
7 Tips on Turning Your Inner Voice Around
7 Tips on Changing Your Inner Voice
Seems that you are fighting one battle after another with your own mind. Your main focus is to win each battle and conquer your mind, and get it to quiet down. Whether you know it or not the enemy is your inner voice. It is like all you do is constantly fight with yourself. Unfortunately, it seems like you are losing.
If your inner voice is negative, it can crush your self-confidence, self-esteem, self-worth, self-loyalty and most of all your self-love. It can also beat you up with self-blame, self-shame, and self-judgment for things you did not even do as well as disconnect you from your core self.The more you listened and feed negative comments in your head, the more you dislike, distrust and hate yourself.
Your inner voice can cause a great deal emotional suffering. The more battles it wins the more influence and power it gains over your thoughts. At that point, it takes over the direction of your emotions and behaviors, and reactions causing you to serve as it dictates. Don't be a slave to your inner voice.
I want to share with you a few specific suggestions on how you can quiet your inner critic. If you are diligent with these suggestions, you can replace your inner critic’s content, which will result in changing your inner thoughts to be positive and supportive.
1. Know your enemy and its Intentions
Recognize, observer and listen to messages being said in your head. Listen to your inner voice with a different perspective as if you are hearing it on the radio. Write each statement down. Recognize that each statement is a false story, misrepresentation and an outright lie said to you by someone who is against you. Understand it wants to take over your mind and control your life.
Know that your inner voice does not have or express emotions. The content of its words originated from negative beliefs, judgments and attitudes you have formed in your subconscious about yourself through childhood and repeats it back to you. It means your inner voice's tone and manner becomes automatic.
2. Create a Strategy
Analyze every critical statement and decide if the content is true. Determine if you truly deserve the negativity, doubt, judgment, self-defeating thoughts or criticism it throws at you.
Write down every statement that is thrown at you. Then note next to each critical statement which life situation or event it comes from. A good strategy is the more you know about where your enemy came from the more power you have in changing the critical content. Find proof of why the criticism is wrong and unfounded. When you find the real truth, you will create a crack in that thought pattern and dissipate its power and influence, but that alone is not enough to achieve mental freedom. Develop a powerful strategy by listing your options to change content.
3. Built an Armament
Create a whole new list of optional positive statements to counter the old ones being volleyed at you. Let your power to create your own statements be your weapons.
Make a separate list of new positive statement to counteract each negative statement. Once you have created this new list, tear up the old one and throw it away. Arming yourself can be as simple as structuring new counter statements like…“I deserve to be something” “I am good enough or “I deserve to look at myself in the mirror and love myself.”
Research has shown writing down negative statements, doubts, thoughts, and judgments then tearing them up and burning or throwing the list in the garbage increase your feeling of power, self-worth, and self-value.
4. Embedded Discipline and Positiveness through Practice
Once you have created your new list, say your list to yourself ten times a day for 90 days.
The trick to defeating your enemy is through forming discipline. Discipline is accomplished by practicing your new list verbally over and over again until it fortifies your mind. Once you’re your mental filters are fortified, it is time to manifest them in your emotions, thoughts, and actions.
5. Be Consistent and Strong
Accept and feel a deep obligation your new statements of self. Consistently follow through every day for 90 days. Change your mindset that you have won and you are in charge of how you think about yourself, how you believe about yourself, what you are capable of, and how you will perform.
Track yourself by keeping a journal of your progress. That way you will be able to see your commitment and thought change day by day for all90days. Write down how you change daily. Journaling will help you recognize the battles you win and add motivation.
6. Make your Fortress Healthy and Strong
Surround yourself with people who see and experience you in a positive light, who support you and know you as you really are. Let people who love you reflect the real you back to you the positiveness you are manifesting toward them. Practice the balance of receiving and giving positive content about each other. 7. Give Respect where Respect is Earned
Understand that your inner voice has been attempting to take over your mind your whole life. It wants you to think doubtful, negative and self-critical. Don't give into the invading negative comments in your head. Work hard at change, fight each small scrimmage. In the process earn your own respect by taking charge of forming your own thoughts. You have that power. Once you earn your own respect, the rest is pretty much is practice, practice, and practice more.
Takeaway If you follow these tips, you can win the war for your thoughts and be the master of yourself and your life.
If you need more help to remove negative thinking from destroying your ability to get what you want out of life then visit my websitehomepage and click here to download my gift of my eBook to you. Coach Bill